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Legal service India => Divorce Laws => Topic started by: ishs23 on October 18, 2013, 12:25:51 AM

Title: legal Advice needed
Post by: ishs23 on October 18, 2013, 12:25:51 AM
Hi, I am a resident of New Delhi, India. Two months back my husband and I had an argument where he got so abusive and aggressive that he forced me out of the house. Since that day he has cut all his contacts with me and came to meet me just once with a lawyer uncle of his and threatened to divorce me. our's is a love marriage and we got married last year only on 26th October. There have been problems from my inlaws side from day one but I ignored them all for the sake of a happy married life. I have tried to contact my husband through phones texts and emails, as he does not take my call, to ask him to forget the past and start afresh but he does not respond. I do not want a divorce and want to talk out issues, whatever he or I have, and give this marriage a chance to atleast flourish. i love my husband and want to stay with him. Please help me on what can I do to stop my husband from divorcing me or forcing me to do so?
Also since I left the house my husband and his family emptied the entire house and took away all my belongings and are not telling me where my stuff is. How can I get my belongings back? Even though my family tried to contact his and ask them to hand over the house keys so that I could altleast take my stuff, they did not give me he key and kept on saying I can take the stuff back when my husband returns. But it never happened and they ran away with my stuff. Ours was a rented accommodation. Please help me with your advice on the same.
Title: Re: legal Advice needed
Post by: advbose on October 18, 2013, 04:56:44 AM
Your husband cannot Divorce you unilaterally, Just as marriage cannot be solemnized unilaterally. So without your wish he is not getting a Divorce, so thats settled.

Now regarding your belongings you have a complete right over it, thats called streedan and no one can take it away from you.

now in this case you want to continue your marriage thats very positive, you should ask the elders in your family to reason with him and solve it amicably.

if that does not happen do let us know, we will guide you for the next possible step.

by the way which city are you from?

Title: Re: legal Advice needed
Post by: ishs23 on October 21, 2013, 01:14:56 AM
Hi,
I reside in Delhi and currently putting up with my parents. In consent with me, my lawyer has even send my husband and his family a legal notice under the restitution and conjugal rights of Hindu Marriage Act, asking my husband to take me back and not forcing me to seek a legal resort to take matters to the next level. Even though he has not replied to me yet can you suggest me what replies can he give and on what grounds can he refuse to take me back? Can he henceforth also suggest through the letter that he wants a divorce? What if I reply saying I do not want one hence would not grant my consensus for it?
Title: Re: legal Advice needed
Post by: ishs23 on November 06, 2013, 01:17:49 AM
Someone please reply to my query.
Title: Re: legal Advice needed
Post by: advkkreddy on November 06, 2013, 07:54:00 PM
if you do not want a divorce he won't get it that easily, he would have to contest it, that won't be easy.

now why is your husband not taking you back? why did you leave your husband's home

Please note that distance in married life has been the single biggest reason for never coming back together again.

make all efforts to go back, you are still a legally married wife of your husband, you can just walk into your holy matrimony, what are you waiting for?

Do you want some to blow the whistle for you to start your run back to your home?

Title: Re: legal Advice needed
Post by: advjaya on November 06, 2013, 09:49:43 PM
Go to your husbands home and start afresh, u don't need legalities to do so
Title: Re: legal Advice needed
Post by: ishs23 on November 07, 2013, 05:22:13 AM
I am not waiting for anyone to blow the whistle to start my run back! If you have not read the query properly then please do it first before using such derogatory way of replying to questions put forward by a person in distress.

My husband and I were staying in a rented accommodation in Delhi as his businesses and my job are positioned here. My husband's paternal home is in Narwana, a village in Haryana, and I cant possibly go stay there leaving behind my job. Since, my husband refused to give me any money post marriage, leaving the job and being a stay at home wife is not an option. I am a copywriter by profession and working in an advertising agency. In Delhi, my husband would most probably be staying at his uncle's place who is a lawyer by profession and the main reason behind the problems which occurred post him throwing me out of the house and vacating our house. No one from his family side, including the parents, have come forward to talk to us despite us trying to reach out to them to arrange for a dialogue. Since my husband refuses to take my calls or reply to any of my message, i am not even sure if he is currently staying in his native village or with his uncle. I can't go stay with him at his uncle's for sure and with my in-laws it seems difficult as they are jats and I feel that to save their honour and reputation from getting maligned in public, they can harm me. 
Title: Re: legal Advice needed
Post by: advabdul on November 07, 2013, 09:01:18 PM
If you should report the matter to Caw cell, seek their help in resolving the problems between you and your husband.

mention all your fears from your in laws and about your belongings to them, they will recover that for you.

also mention the interference of the in laws in your married life.

this is the best way to go about it as of now.

do this at once do not delay, time is very crucial in marital life.

the more time passes the more difficult it will be to get your husband back
Title: Re: legal Advice needed
Post by: ishs23 on November 07, 2013, 10:06:39 PM
Hi,
I have already reported the matter to CAW cell and have my first sitting with them tomorrow. I have submitted them an application listing out all the problems that have cropped into our relation because of the interference of the in-laws, sister, extended family...I just wanted to know what if my husband do not turn up for the meeting? What is the next step I should take? Is there a possibility of him not turning up and instead straight away putting a divorce case against me? How can I protect myself in that case?
Also in my application and the RCR notice I by mistake mentioned the date of my husband throwing me out of the house wrong. Can I amend that during the course of the sitting or filing of the case? Hope it would not have any adverse affect on my case right now as it is just a complaint.
Title: Re: legal Advice needed
Post by: ishs23 on November 12, 2013, 11:42:24 PM
What is the link about? It does not exist.

I had my meeting session last Saturday. my husband it seems was trying to press cruelty charges against me by saying I did not work in kitchen and that he had recordings of talks that he will produce in court where my family and I have admitted to having kept gold given to me by his family. Though he could not go on pressing false and really inane charges against me as I countered him each time with logical explanations to whatever he said. The IO did ask him what does he want and if he s ready to take me back. He first said that he would have taken me back but now that I have lodged a complaint against him he is scared. the IO then told him to talk with his family and finally come back to him after a week and tell him straight away what does he want. If he takes me back well and good, if he doesn't, a case would now be furthered against him. To this his promptly said he would have no problem taking me back provided I give him in writing that I would live like a normally with him and jazz. The IO has told him to come back with his final decision this weekend.

Does it mean he would agree to take me back or will he come back and say he cant and will instead agree to let whatever case be registered against him? He had come with a lawyer and noted down all the points I used to counter him and quash his lies. It seems all he can use as a defense against me at the moment is cruelty and that too of the lowest order where he said that I did not know how to make chapatis so made him eat rice. Does he have any strong chance against my charges of him throwing me out of the house, deserting me, vacating the house without informing me and running away with my stuff? I have presented all the proofs of his run away act to the IO in his presence.
Title: Re: legal Advice needed
Post by: advabdul on November 13, 2013, 03:23:04 AM
see gold or presents received by you from either your parents or from his parents during the time of marriage as gifts are called STREEDAN that is yours no matter what and he cannot question you on that count.

and regarding he taking you back or not we have to see what happens the next date
Title: Re: legal Advice needed
Post by: ishs23 on November 13, 2013, 05:55:16 AM
Thanks. Would keep you posted on whatever happens in the next meeting.
Title: Re: legal Advice needed
Post by: ishs23 on November 21, 2013, 10:42:29 PM
Hi, I had my meeting as scheduled. Though nothing concrete came of it, my husband did try to threaten me with going to court for putting a false complaint against him and his family. When I told my IO the same he said I am not threatening her. He is not saying anything in clear terms as in what does he want.

I had told my IO clearly, in front of my husband, that divorce is something I will not give and I want my house and all my belongings and life back to which my husband replied that he could have taken me back but now that a complaint has been registered in his name it is difficult for him and instead he wants me to give in writing that I will not do anything of this sorts again. This was his stand last time but this time he did not say anything clearly. My IO has given him the list of my things that is in his possession and has also asked him to get all my winter clothing with him when he comes for the meeting again on 28th Nov. 

What if he does not bring all my clothes and just few of them? Do I have to accept them or should I return them and tell him I will take it only when he brings all my clothing including wedding saris and suits and other daily wear? What could be my husband's next step? Is he not yet aware that he could get into a deep mess if he continues to behave like this? Can he force me for a divorce?

His lawyer has accompanied him to the two meetings we have had so far. Even though he keeps standing outside the meeting room and does not interfere but none of the family members come. Strange, since the time my husband threw me out and ran away with everything after vacating the house, none of his family has come forward to talk to anyone in my family despite us trying to reach out to them.
Title: Re: legal Advice needed
Post by: ishs23 on November 22, 2013, 12:26:58 AM
Someone please reply to my query...
Title: Re: legal Advice needed
Post by: ishs23 on November 25, 2013, 04:56:45 AM
response awaited...
Title: Re: legal Advice needed
Post by: ishs23 on December 10, 2013, 03:14:24 AM
Even though my last session was a good one at the CWA cell and my husband agreed to take me back in due course, the next date given to me for another mediation session with my husband and in-laws is 13th. But in the interim my husband sent me a legal notice stating that I should render an apology to him for registering a fake complaint against him with the cell. He has also cast aspersions on my character and called me a sucker for money and his property in the notice, which is not true as not even once during the course of the session have I demanded divorce or any money. My intention is clear from day one, which is to settle back with my husband, when the divorce threat has been coming from him all this while.

What should I do? Do i have to send a reply back to the notice as the deadline mentioned in the notice was 48 hrs which expired last week, and which I do not think is important at this point when the case is already with CAW. Should i wait till 13th session to finally see what he says and then move with the legal thing?

Kindly do reply!!
Title: Re: legal Advice needed
Post by: advabdul on December 10, 2013, 08:32:08 AM
no need to reply to any such illegal notices. wait for the next date of mediatation and see how it works out. as for signing any such agreement where it is stated that u have registered a fake case never sign, you will be completely shattered
Title: Re: legal Advice needed
Post by: ishs23 on December 10, 2013, 10:32:44 PM
Thanks for the reply. Will keep you in loop upon what happens on 13.
Cheers
Title: Re: legal Advice needed
Post by: ishs23 on December 13, 2013, 09:59:38 PM
Hi,
My husband did not turn up for the session this time but instead left an application in the cell stating he was unwell and attached with the application were his medical certificates. He had requested for another date so my IO has told him to turn up on 24th positively even if unwell.

Also in between my husband left a list of articles (part of the dowry including household articles, clothes etc. given to me by my parents) in the cell. Though the list is not complete but there is some contradiction here as as per the notice sent by him previously he had clearly stated that there was nothing given to me by my parents and he does not posses any articles but in the women cell he left the list stating that I agree the said articles are in my possession. 

I seek your advice on the following:
1) I am clueless as to where my are and life is heading. What exactly could my husband be insinuating?
2) Should I give up on the hope of returning to my married life with my husband?
3) Is it an indication that he is readying himself for a divorce battle with me wherein not even once have I ever said I want that as my fight is to get back and not break ties.
4) What can I do in the current situation to make my way back into a life with my husband?
5) Incase on 24th he says he does not want to live with me, what should be my answer? I do not fall into the rigmarole of court cases as it was to save my marriage I had approached the cell and not seek an end to it.

Kindly do reply as I need the most healthy and positive response to the situation.

Regards
Title: Re: legal Advice needed
Post by: ishs23 on December 25, 2013, 10:05:11 PM
Hi,
My husband on 24th Dec came with his lawyer uncle of his to the CAW and said they will not take me back. They tried hard to push us for MCD by telling us no point going to court and wasting 4-5 years and also threatening me that they will use their resources if we do not bow down to their demands. We flatly refused their demand and told them that they can not force us for a thing like this. They know how much guilty are they because I have solid proofs with me that shows the act of throwing me out of the house and then running away with my stuff and staying out of touch with us was a well-planned move by them.
However I am in no mood to divorce. Kindly tell me what is the next step I should take?
a) Would filing a DV case on them a better idea?
b) My husband has lied to me about his income and said he earns just 12k a month while the lifestyle led by him is pretty lavish. 27k was only the house rent that he was shelling out for the apartment we took on rent in Vasant Kunj. How can I produce proofs of his real income as I do not have much details about it?
c) What benefit would I have if I file a DV case first? Would it prevent him from putting a divorce case against me?

Please do reply at the earliest as my next mediation date is 4th of Jan and I need to know what should I say there in response to him saying he does not want to take me back? Should I ask the IO in front of him to register my case though I am not too knee on putting a dowry case on him.
   
Title: Re: legal Advice needed
Post by: ishs23 on December 28, 2013, 01:02:02 AM
Someone please reply to my query!
Title: Re: legal Advice needed
Post by: tapanr on February 09, 2014, 07:41:52 AM
Hello,

we were a very happily married Hindu couple since 2005.

2009, Iost my job in UAE and had to come back to India while my wife remained in UAE.

While i was desperately looking for a job, I could not get either in India or UAE. My wife kept travelling to India to visit me.

In 2011, we went for a small vacation where my Mother in Law misbehaved with me. She left us in middle of vacation and me and my wife drove back alone.

Wife flew back to UAE but my mother in law kept misbehaving with me, for which i told her some stron words.

In exchange, she made my wife resign from her job, cancel her visa and come back to India.

I went to her place to make sure that my wife has really come back. There I was attacked by her relatives, escorted out by police and put in lock up overnight under section 155.

After 5 months we started chatting with each other and she kept making stupid excuses of delaying coming back.

In exchange, I abused her father, disclosed my mother in laws extramarital affair and 2 murders.


I flew to UAE with a job in 2012. We were chatting normally while she was yet reluctant to come back and yet confirming me that she wants to come back but her family members wont allow her to.

I abused her family big time on the emails. almost 20 emails per day, full of royal order desi north indian adjectives, cc to the whole family.

I opened her Facebook and emails to find out that she is purposely delaying to come back.This made her to file reports in cybercell for hacking and a few more police complains (NOT FIR) against myself and my mother. Probably to claim back the jewllery we purchased with joint savings. I realised that she has made the cyber cell summons to my Managing Director in UAE, because of which i lost my job again.

She has also filed divorce case on grounds of "irretreavable damage to marriage" and "change of my religion (since abusive words are not practised in Hinduism".

She appealed for an exparty proceeding since I never went to the court from UAE.Judge granted her the permission for ex-party.

I am yet very hopeful and confident that she does not want to divorce me, She is under heavy control of her mother who is a bad woman to an extent of murdering 2 lives (sister in law and one abortion). Her mother made my wife physically satisfy the politicians so the murder case be closed as suicide. My wife got pregnant and her mother killed that child too. I knew this before marriage and overlooked it for a happy life forward.

While I recently visited India, I couriered her a mobile phone, just before boarding the flight to UAE so that she does not mess with my passport.

In return, her lawyer came with her and police not less than 5 times and I picked up the phone to threaten him of making police reports that he forced enter my residence, tried to loot and rape my mother and threatened her of life. I have not yet lodged this report. It was only a threat.

My lawyers have adviced to let the decree come to be able to kill the police complaints she has made. The moment i approach High Court to re-unite, the police reports will come live again.

Her lawyer is well known for his crooked approach and blackmail. He was also slapped a fine of Rs 10,000 for wasting Court's time on a baseless petition.

How do I get my wife back?? She is neither receiving my phone nor replying my mails. She does read them all.
Title: Re: legal Advice needed
Post by: tapanr on February 09, 2014, 07:42:58 AM
Crooks think alike....where ever they are....in my case it is her mother fooling around :)
Title: Re: legal Advice needed
Post by: tapanr on February 09, 2014, 07:51:24 AM
@ishs
File an application for RECONSTITUTION OF CONJUGAL RIGHTS..... mylimitation is that I do not want to travel internationally to attend court....for expense and risking my passport.... you can as you are living in same town...

Read my thread. one adv misthi mukherjee has adviced to file one more IR (idunno what it is)...to prevent relatives to interfere in marriage.....

I am sure you will get your life back....... my good wishes....
Title: Re: legal Advice needed
Post by: tapanr on February 09, 2014, 08:06:12 AM
@ishs

Dear Girl,

Judges become JUDGE after living a life of an advocate. They are not fools.

Honesty is your only weapon in court. I reconciled a divorce of my friend. Judge applauded it while the guy's family insisted on divorce and therefore I gave up.

Family Courts of India are not meant to seal DIVORCE GRANTED. Their objective is to RECONILE and SAVE a family.

The moment you file a Domestic Violence, 498 A.....Judge/CAW will come to know of your inherent motives.

Like I am doing, maintain ONLY ONE STAND....... I WANT MY SPOUSE BACK..................NO OTHER OPTION.........till death do us apart.

this will grant you enough of energy to talk confidently and not produce any body language signal (they come naturally and unconciously) that makes the Judge/CAW make to think of your inherent and unspoken motives (Police/Judiciary are taught to read body language prior to petition).

You will surely get your husband back!!!
Title: Re: legal Advice needed
Post by: advbose on February 13, 2014, 08:52:11 AM
Its clear from your query that your husband will not take u back.... Regarding his family staying is but natural, they are trying to avoid any further allegations on them.... Regarding him giving your belongings back, most probably he will return to create a good impression to court..
. If I font divorce him. He wont get it thats for sure
... But u both will be running around in court for the rest of your life